A Reminder To Anyone Ever Called Over-Emotional

I have spent the past few years of my single life trying to harden my own soul. I find myself becoming more and more detached and impassive, rather than welcoming a full spectrum of emotions. I am still warm and cordial to people, I just avoid situations that make me feel deeply. Lately, I have been asking myself why? Why are women sacrificing the most beautiful part of being female?

Image has a lot to do with it. Men seem to crave a casual, care-free woman. Someone who is flexible and never cries. Someone who will go to bed with him and not develop feelings. Someone who never gets attached. Men long for these “half-relationships”. When they are within proximity it feels like companionship: holding hands and cuddling during a movie, whispering sweet nothings and talking about the future. However, in between those moments of affection lies all the mixed signals. He won’t respond to messages, he dates other women, and he constantly backs out of plans.He only wants a relationship when it is on his own terms and in his own time. Consequently, women are forced to protect themselves.

Our survival instincts compel us to feel less. To stop being so emotional. We wear armor to defend against the sting of rejection and build walls to keep out the pain of betrayal. We conform. Slowly we become emotionally-suppressed females because it feels safer than the alternative.  And by doing so, we slowly strip away everything that makes us human, everything that makes us whole.

But we must go back to our roots and remember what it means to be a woman. There is a reason we are biologically responsible for raising children. There are intentions behind our extra dose of estrogen. We are unique in the sense that we are capable of feeling so much. From crying over puppies to innate maternal instincts, we are incredibly special. 

Hence, why we must remember: Our feelings are always valid.

There might be people in the world who are afraid to confront their emotions. These are the people that will try to debase our right to wholeheartedly feel. They will resent us and our impassioned hearts. They will try to break down our spirits and make our emotions feel like a weakness.

And the only way to combat the negativity is to meet it with kindness.

Match it with love. Greet it with compassion. Because at the end of the day, it is our sensitivity that makes us stronger and our capacity to feel that will allow us to thrive.


Samantha ClarkComment